Squash Perfection

  There is so much pressure this day in age to fit into the mold society has laid out for us.  You have to be a certain size, have so much money, own the right house/car, wear the best clothes, parent a certain way, vote to please, and on and on and on.  It is exhausting to live up to such ridiculous standards!
  People go to great lengths to portray the perfect image.  Many go into debt to show how much money they "have," people work out to the point of exhaustion and starve themselves to death to fit into the ideal size jeans. Women spend hundreds of dollars on their hair, nails, and skin. People cram so many activities into their schedule just to feel busy and important.
  I would beat myself up on a daily basis for not fitting into these perfect bounds.  My husband and I don't use credit cards, so we have no choice but to live within our means.  I am happy we live this way.  I used to be ashamed to shop at certain stores, or to not be able to shop at others.  I was embarrassed that we couldn't buy the best and the newest of everything for our kids. Now I realize that we have all we need and plenty of what we want.  My focus has shifted from the things we don't have to the things we do.  I have so much to be thankful for and I am blessed.
  I saw how awesome all of these "bloggers" and "pinterest-worthy" moms were at being crafty and creative with their kids.  I saw how I was falling extremely short with the typical standards for discipline, media, and extracurricular activities.  I began to loathe how awful I was at being the perfect mother. Despite my lack of creative flair and soccer mom qualities, I was made to be the mother of my children.  No one else could fill that role.
  My weight has been a pain ever since I had kids.  I'd try to lose weight and fail or lose and gain it all back, and then some.  I was wearing myself thin trying to fit into the standards "they" have set for us.  Stressing out over how my body looked did more damage than if I were to just focus on being as healthy as I could in that moment.  I did more damage to myself by holding back in many areas of life because of how I looked instead of grabbing life by the horns and not caring about what others thought when they looked at me.
  I would drag myself through the mud and back again over the areas in which I felt I had not measured up.  I beat myself up pretty hard.  I was looking at everything I did wrong and everything everyone else did right.  Then I woke up.  God showed me who I am in Him and that none of this ridiculous crap even matters in the end.
  I give my all to my kids, and on the days I can't, I give what I have.  I try to spend our family's hard-earned money wisely (an ongoing struggle). I pray each day so that I can open my heart to the uplifting things God has to say to me.  I'm learning how to block out those pressures the world places on me and just hear from the One who matters.
  If you are struggling to fit into a mold that wasn't designed for you, I want to encourage you to really meditate on what God made you to be.  Dig into His word and listen to His voice.  Allow Him to show you who YOU are.  Forgive yourself when you mess up, and let go of those unattainable and irrational standards you may have set for yourself.  Since I have done this, I have felt so FREE and have experienced so much joy and peace that I can hardly contain myself.
  You were not made to be that perfect actress you idolize.  You were not made to be the perfect neighbor you envy.  You were not made to be your perfect sister, your perfect mother, or your perfect best friend.  God made you to be perfectly you. Embrace all that you are and let God tell you what needs to be improved upon. It's a long and draining process, one which I am still going through, but it is worth it!   Stomp on, spit at, SQUASH the world's idea of perfection and enjoy life in the way that is perfectly suited for you. You are worth more than your struggle to be someone you just aren't meant to be.  You are worthy of being YOU!

~Em