How the Robin Williams Tragedy Hits Close to Home

    Sometimes the people who seem the happiest on the outside are absolutely tormented on the inside.  Robin Williams is just one example of a person such as this.  His death has impacted me more than I let on.  I actually wanted to avoid talking about it altogether, because it has stirred up a lot of emotions in me, and a lot of reminders of my not-to-distant past.

    For those of you who do not know me well, and for those who are new to my blog, I suffered from severe depression.  Depression that almost ruined my marriage.  Depression that wrapped its ugly fingers around my very core.  Depression that could have, and came very close to a similar end result as Mr. Williams' had it not been for my lifelong relationship with the Lord and those people who fought so hard for me.  Not many knew about my depression... and only a couple knew about my fleeting thoughts of suicide.  This issue is a very real, very scary, extremely embarrassing, often invisible fight.  It took a lot for me to write about it last year, and it still scares the snot out of me to write about it today, but now that I'm in a place where life is livable again, and I feel true joy and peace, I need to speak up.  I need others to know they are not alone and that they are not horrible people for going through this.  Here are two of my previous blogs on depression, if you'd like to read them: the first is my story and a bit on how to approach a loved one who is going through such a difficult mindset: A Glimmer of Hope.  The second is a sort of update/bit of encouragement, and a look into how I personally found my way out: There Is Hope.

    People often like to blame a person and the way they live their life for their depression.  While choices can absolutely affect the degree of one's depression, it is incredibly important that you NOT start pointing the finger and try to fix them when you have no clue what they are going through.  Many people experience depression at some point in their life.... depression can be brought on by life's circumstances.  BUT in this instance (I believe), and in my circumstance, it is a lifelong battle, whether the depression is felt at all times or not.  I will not have someone tell me I'm living my life the wrong way, so I had it coming.  My life is wonderful, my circumstances are pretty ideal.... I love Jesus with all my heart, I have a solid marriage, I put so much into my kids..... so to tell me that it is my fault... or to tell another that it is their fault that they suffer is infuriating to me.  Don't do it.  Each case of depression is different from the next.  The best thing we can do to help our loved ones is to be there for them, to pray for them, to bring as much joy into their lives as possible.  Leave the condemnation, the unsolicited advice, and the finger pointing at the door.  All of that can cause so much more damage than has already been done.  A depressed person feels enough guilt as it is; we don't need to add more kindling to the fire.

    If you are suffering from depression, know that I feel so deeply for you.  I understand what that feels like, even if I'm not in your exact situation.  I pray for you, my heart aches for you, and I am here for you, however you need me to be.  Knowing Jesus, finding support in loved ones, and doing your best to climb out of this is all wonderful... but please don't beat yourself up when you find that these relationships and efforts don't always envelop you in light and joy.  When you find those moments of peace, enjoy them to the fullest, and figure out what you've been doing and how you can continue to feel at ease.  This fight is an uphill battle, but you can get through this.  Remember that there are people who love and pray for you, even if you don't see them.  I say all this, not as advice, because what works for me may not work for you.... but I say this to encourage you, to show you that there are ways to enjoy life again; you just have to find them.  I have faith that you will!  I look forward to hearing your success story, and I encourage you to share with others who may be hurting, so they may be inspired to find the light at the end of their tunnels.

    One more thing.... and I stress this!  Suicide is NEVER the answer.  There is always hope, even when you can't see it.  Don't be too ashamed to reach out for help.  Find a loved one, a pastor, call a hotline.... do whatever you can to find value in your life.  You ARE valuable, you ARE worthy of living a life of happiness, you ARE an important part of society, and you WOULD ABSOLUTELY, WITHOUT DOUBT, be INCREDIBLY missed if you chose to end your life.  So please, if you've gotten to the point of what you feel to be no return, please, please, please seek help.  Each life is too precious, too fragile, too valuable to throw away....  don't let the darkness swallow you whole.  Don't let it win.  Choose LIFE.  <3

    Rest in peace, dear Robin.  You were loved by many.  You will always hold a special place in my heart.

~Em

This was me, doing my best to put on a happy face during one of my very darkest times.  The torment isn't always visible.  Always walk in love.  Always.

Simple Homeschool Organization

    I have had some homeschool newbies asking lots of questions lately about how this all works.  I recently covered my plans for curriculum and programs for this upcoming year here. (Click on highlighted word to follow link.)  Another big question is: how do I organize it all?  I do things as simply as possible.  With a couple quick, inexpensive purchases, and a bit of creative thinking on where to store your homeschool supplies, you can be well on your way to an organized, stress-free system.

    Here's what I'm doing this year, and have loved in years past:

I found these crates at Walmart for under $4.00 each

    The key for our family is to have individual crates to store each child's supplies.  The kids will pull out their own bins when it is time to start their school day.  Last year we had baskets of shared crayons, markers, and the like, and we stored everyone's notebooks in the same drawer.  While it worked well at first, things can get a bit messy... or lost that way.  So we're back to our old system, and the kids couldn't be happier. We have designated our coat closet as our "homeschool closet" and everything will be out of sight when school is not in session.

    Let me talk a bit about what these crates contain:

• Binders~ We will use these as portfolios for the school year.  I feel better saving a good sampling of the work my children complete as "proof" if we need it, and also as a little memory book.  
• Folders~ I have one pocket folder for each child.  One side will contain the worksheets the kids need to complete each day, and the other pocket is for their finished work that I will correct/check each night.  It's a great way to keep track. Folders always go back in the bins, so there's no losing them. We didn't follow this system last year, and our designated "turn in" spot wasn't always used by the younger munchkins.  This will make it a bit easier on them, I think.  For the kids who are able to work without assistance, I will also include an assignment sheet for each day, so they can tackle each subject and check off their completed work.
• Notebooks~ Each child has a notebook for written homework that doesn't come on a worksheet.  As they fill their notebooks, I will replace them with a new one.  This will cut down on all the loose papers I find around the house.  
• Pencil Boxes~ These are to store the obvious... pencils... along with other writing/coloring supplies.
• Workbooks/Textbooks~ I will put the necessary books in their bins the night before they use them, so there is no searching when it is time to tackle a subject.  We will do a couple subjects as a family and then do written work according to grade level, but for those subjects that are grade specific, this plan will help us get moving faster throughout the day.  
• Art Supplies/Extras~  These are items they won't use every day, so if there is something they'll need for a certain project/assignment on any given day, I'll add those items to avoid searching once again.  

    So you see, when each child has everything they need for the day in a box, there are no excuses for delayed starts with every subject-change.  Avoiding delays will cause us to zip through our school day faster so we can get on with personal interests, field trips, and family activities.

    As far as record keeping goes, I have a teacher binder I put together that contains our school calender, a copy of our schedule, important school-related websites/passwords, attendance sheets, course of study worksheets, daily progress charts, field trip logs, a copy of the current homeschool laws for our state, and will include "report cards" or grade sheets for the kids that need them.  

    For teacher/mommy supplies and those items not stored in individual crates, I have a couple extra kitchen cupboards I use as storage.  I'll probably purchase a couple clear plastic drawers for those items soon, so they can be stored in the homeschool closet with the rest of our supplies.  These items are off limits until they are placed in the kids' crates.  This prevents drama, excessive use, and giant messes.  

    As far as scheduling goes, we stick to a pretty basic schedule.  I have a post on scheduling you can check out here.  While we tweak our schedule here and there, the gist of it is the same.  This might give you an idea of how to tackle your homeschool day.

    I think that just about covers the gist of topics my friends and acquaintances have asked about.  If you have questions that haven't been answered in this post, or the others I've shared with you, feel free to message me on Facebook or email me at emilylorie82@gmail.com.  As always, I am more than happy to talk schooling with you, but please remember, I keep things very simple.

    If you are new to homeschooling this upcoming year, welcome to the family.  To the seasoned schoolers, I wish you all the best as you teach, love on, and watch your children grow this year.  Everyone have a blessed 2014/2015 school year!

~Em

Menu: Week 2

    Hi guys!  We're keeping it super simple this week.  So simple that I don't even have links for recipes to send you.  All the meals are self-explanatory.  Nice, huh?!  If you'd like to make any of these with a twist, or desire something a little more daring, check out my Pinterest page for some inspiration.  I have lots of "Good Eats" boards and pins on there.  :)

Terry Family Menu: Week 2

Breakfast Options:

*Fresh fruit is always available on the side.

~Toast & Fruit

~Fruit Smoothies (we blend fresh or frozen fruit with milk or water, spinach, and honey)

~Oatmeal & Fruit

~Eggs & Toast

Lunch Options:

*Fresh veggies and/or fruit served on the side.

~Deli Sandwiches or Wraps

~Cucumber Wraps

~PB&J Sandwiches

~Cheese & Veggie Platter

~Leftovers

Dinner:

*Hot veggies or side salad served with each meal.

*We leave a couple days free for leftovers, meals out, or cookouts with friends.

~Pizza Subs - Check out Hayden's cooking show page The Simple Cooking Show to see his very own take on this recipe.  He'll post his video sometime this week, so keep your eyes peeled!

~Spaghetti & Garlic Bread

~Taco Night

~Chicken & Rice

~Loaded Baked Potatoes

~Leftovers

Snack Options this week:

~veggies and dip

~fresh fruit

~popcorn

~pretzels

~yogurt

Drinks: Water and the occasional glass of milk for the kids. :)

There's not much original thinking going on here, but it might spark an idea or two when you just don't know what to make for dinner.  Happy eating, friends! :)

~Em

Just Feed the Babies

    If you are a mom, you are most likely well aware of the huge breastfeeding debate.  When I say this, I include all the intricately detailed side-debates that fit into this category.  Just to get it out of the way, I will give you my opinion.  Are ya ready?

    I'm all about feeding your baby!  Yep.  As long as you're feeding your baby and caring for their needs, you are an awesome mama and you do not deserve to be guilted into doing things any other way.  You can bottle feed or breastfeed and you are good people regardless of your choice.

    I personally choose to nurse my babies, under a cover.  Does that mean I'm going to give a glare and a snarl at a mom who chooses to nurse without a cover?  No!  If she's comfortable nursing without a cover, more power to her.  As long as she isn't one of the few who let it all hang out like a porn star, she isn't bothering me one bit... and you know what?  Most breastfeeding moms are so discreet, you don't even know they're feeding their babies.

    My issue is the moms who try to make ME feel guilty for apparently "smothering" my baby with a blanket and taking away his/her much needed oxygen.  Funny how my oxygen-deprived babies are all alive and well.... breathing, thinking, unaffected by that dreaded blanket I draped over them for the sake of my own comfort and modesty.

    I am quite modest.  Not as modest as some, much more modest than others.  Yes, cleavage will pop out here and there, but usually by accident. I'm not one to run around in a bikini... and even when I had a more bikini-worthy body, I felt really uncomfortable and awkward in them.  I like to be covered.  I'm comfortable when I'm covered.  So my decision to wear a nursing cover in public, or even in front of my own children, is purely based on my own contentment.

    Nursing is natural and wonderful, and I am in no way ashamed of my choice because I use something to hide under while I'm doing it.  I don't care who knows I'm nursing, and I realize it is quite obvious what's going on when that cover comes out, but I will not feel bad because I choose to do it this way.

    I know people who nurse, uncovered, and are graceful, discreet, and absolute breastfeeding rockstars.  More power to them!  I wish I could float through life without fumbling around... but I'm just not that fluid in my movements.  ;)

    On to the bottle-feeding moms.  I was one with my first baby.  Nursing overwhelmed me and I lasted about four days.  So I understand completely where these moms are coming from.  They get more guilt from society than any of we breastfeeding mothers, and it is really sad to me.  There could be a number of reasons they chose bottle over breast, and we shouldn't look down our noses at them.  There are so many adoptive mothers out there.  There are mothers who tried nursing, but were brought to tears over it.  Some want to push past the hard parts, some would rather enjoy these new days of motherhood and not stress.  To think less of them because they chose differently than us is mean.

    Think of a time when you were talked down to, or were made to feel less than because you did something differently than someone else.  It doesn't feel good, does it?  I experience it all the time.... I homeschool, have tattoos, don't have a current church home, just to name a few.  I've heard it all because of these choices, and it stings, even if I'm 100% confident in my reasoning behind these choices.  So let's all remember that feeling next time we lovingly, or not-so-lovingly desire to tell someone they're doing it "wrong."

    Parenthood is hard enough without outside voices bullying us.  We have enough on our plates with raising our beautiful children.  We don't need any more Mommy-Wars.  Let's lift each other up, support each other, and love each other through this journey, rather than nit-picking all of these things that really just don't matter in the grand scheme of things.

   Have a happy, successful, love-filled day with your kids today, Moms.  I'll be rooting for you!

~Em