Shifting Focus

    I've been thinking a lot lately about priorities.  I've been feeling the pull one way or another to up my focus... I've experienced guilt trips from others, from myself, from society's norms.  I allowed these to bring me down.  I've allowed the thoughts and opinions of others, and even my negative opinions of myself to swallow me whole.

  It is a struggle for most to keep from making idols of those things that are important to them.  Whether it be their marriage, children, careers, keeping up with their looks, finding approval and respect from friends and strangers alike, and the list goes on...  I know I'm guilty of putting much of this at the very top of my list, only to find that my relationship with Jesus keeps inching down the line.

   For me, my biggest struggle has been knowing that I don't measure up in a multitude of areas in my life.  I may be the best I can be in certain areas, but I've let comparison steal my joy.  I've let the gaps and imperfections become the stars of my thoughts while Jesus sits quietly waiting for me to remember Him... all that He is to me, all that He's done for me, all that He has for me, and all that I can be through Him.

    When we start focusing on the things the world dictates as important and worthy of our utmost attention, we lose focus on what is true, what is right, what is real.  We look away from our Savior, and begin sinking into those rough waters we once walked on when our eyes were on Him. We try to become our own saviors.... we think we can do it alone... we put too much faith in ourselves and end up failing miserably.

    I haven't forgotten about my Best Friend, but I surely haven't been the friend He deserves.  I notice that every time I turn away even the slightest bit, the weight of it begins to darken my spirit.  Depression starts tying that noose around my neck.  Anger bubbles up and begins to boil over.  Sadness drowns me in my own tears.  Defeat throws me into that black hole and repeatedly buries me in my own guilt.

    I can't do life on my own.  I can't do life by putting all my faith in my husband or children.  I can't do life by putting all my hope in my friends. I can't do life by believing my successes will bring me true happiness. None of us can.  If we live that way, if we consistently look for saving in all the wrong places we are absolutely fooling ourselves.  We can only thrive with Jesus.

    There will be periods of time where my focus is shifted.  I'll feel on top of the world.  I'll think I have it all and that nothing will stop me.  How naive.  How utterly silly.  All the good, all the glorious things that happen to me, don't happen because of me.  They don't happen because I am worthy.  They happen because Jesus wants good things for me.  How dare I put myself on a pedestal and expect not to tumble under pressure.  How dare I force that sort of worship and praise onto my loved ones, who will never measure up to the perfection that is my Savior.

    I'm not perfect.  I never will be.  I don't know much... and the more I learn, the more I realize that I have not even breached the surface.... but I do know, from my little experience in this world, that I need Jesus.  There's no way around it.  The world's measure of success should mean absolutely nothing to me.  I could mold myself to be much more beautiful, poised, and successful if I really put my mind to it... I believe we all have that drive in us... but all the beauty, money, and adoration.... that's all pale in comparison to what my heart could be if I put my all into growing in the Lord and living a sold out life for HIM.

    That's not to say that we can't be beautiful, successful, or well-loved by others.  Obviously those things are great.... until they become our number one priorities.  All is good and well with our souls until we eagerly gift them to our idols. It's so easy to do this without realizing we've pushed the Lord aside.... we must reel in our thoughts and actions... hold them captive... and direct them toward the One who deserves all of our attention and praise.

    If you're struggling to keep your priorities straight... if you feel the need to shift your focus back on Jesus, know that I am in your corner.  I'm praying for you and your walk with Him.  Will you do the same for me?  I believe this thing called "life" is meant to be lived with joy... we're meant to appreciate the blessings God has given us... but we can so easily take those blessings and make idols of them if we're not careful.  Let's strive to keep our Savior in the spotlight.  The rest of it, however precious must never be more than the supporting cast.... or, in some cases, the backstage crew. ;)

    I know my thoughts are jumbled up and came out in one big mess, but I hope you can sense my intention and know my heart in this matter.  I have messed up royally, so I see the urgency in setting things straight... I hope that you are able to learn from my experience: the importance of Jesus being your #1.  Much love to you, friends.  Hold me accountable, and if you wish, I will do my best to do the same for you! xoxo

~Em