Most of those anxious thoughts we parents get come at night, while we're trying to fall asleep. The house is quiet, the tv is off, the glow of the phone has been extinguished for the night. All that's left between you and sweet sleep is that brain that just has to keep going and going and going....
Being a parent is hard on our hearts. The world keeps plunging into darker and darker territory, mommy wars are viciously attacking us from all angles, we're constantly feeling those punches of reality when our kids show just how free their wills are. It's enough to bring even the strongest person to their knees.
How do we protect our children from the evils of this world? How do we prove that every little decision we make has been prayed over, researched, snot-face ugly cried through, so that we know we have done our absolute best to keep our children healthy, happy, and whole? Why do we have to experience the wrath that is our children's desire to exhibit their own free will? Are we good enough to parent our kids?
I have to remind myself on an hourly basis to do my best and once I've done my part, to hand all of it... all of everything over to God. Being the mama bear that I am, I have to admit, that is so hard to do. So hard. I have this need to control everything in my life.... and that includes everything that happens in my kids' lives, so to hand it over and to forget about it is a challenge. This is where faith steps in. Do I have faith in the God who created the universe? Do I have faith in the One who chose to die not only for me, but for my husband, and each and every one of my children? There is no one who loves my kids more than Jesus. Not even me (although, I have to come in at a very close second). ;)
So when I'm lying in bed, kicking myself over not spending an extra twenty minutes on math that day, or forgetting to get that last kiss and hug in at bedtime, I need to remember that my children are in God's hands. I will always do my darnedest to raise my children the best that I can, but I know that no matter how many times I mess up, no matter how many ways I fall, God will be right there to catch us and direct us down the path He has laid out for us.
If you struggle with those same thoughts, know that you aren't alone. We all wonder if we are enough for our children. We all wonder if we are the right parents for our kids. You know what the answer is? YES! Yes, we are enough because God is right there with us. YES, we are the right parent for our children, because God saw fit to gift them to us while we're here on this sometimes scary, but always beautiful world He created.
When those voices attack you, whether it be from your own mind, or from the mouths of others, shut them out. Unless you are hearing from the voice of God on your worth as a parent, you need not listen.
Hug on your children. Give yourself a pat on the back. Stand up, brush the negativity off your shoulders, and relax, knowing that you've got this, with the help of an incredible God!
YOU.ARE.ENOUGH.
